What If
Written by Anurag Bhateja on May 17, 2009 – 5:28 am -What if I did not bother what you meant to me or what if I just walked away when you came into my life. I am still feeling too bad because I am hurt. I am hurt because I cared and you just went off. I was not asking for the return favor but I was asking for the accessibility to the charm of being around you which I do not think I will get.
Every single broken piece of my heart is still yelling that I am wrong. You must be in some problem and that is the only reason you had such kind of harsh words for me. May be I believe they are harsh and they might not be. I do not understand why I still behave like an innocent child who just want to be loved though I know the phase of being innocent and of child has gone. It was my mistake (I think) to believe that I can think of you in my life.
After my past experience with friends and love, it was hard to make myself ready to get into any kind of true friendship or something like that but you made me think that it was not an end of my emotions but it was just a break. I started the day with you and ended it with a note of thanks. I always tried that I should not become nuisance for you though I made myself so many a times in such a short spam of time of our friendship.
But still I believed that you understand the reason I was talking to you. You understand the situations I am facing and will be a little support by just replying to me. But in all this, I messed up with me and with you. I asked you many a times if I am the reason of bad mood and you refused to agree with me on that but now I feel somewhere it was my mistake to have so much faith in myself that I can be a good friend and can get a sweet friend like you.
I do not think I have enough courage to say anything to you and this is the only reason I am writing all this here. I do not think I will be able to express my feelings to you anymore on net or face to face which I really wanted to someday. I will count every drop fell for you and I will remain silent till I do not find either a way to say sorry or a way to express myself in front of you.
Tags: Bad Mood
Posted in My Life My Thoughts | 2 Comments »
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By Dum on Oct 16, 2009 | Reply
What if the world ends?
that’s the ultimate question….
By akira07 on Oct 17, 2009 | Reply
First of all, anurag, i have a question, why there is so many bad experience of you on this blog. I feel sorry to hear that. Hope all the problem solved. Do your best and face all your problem wisely